What no torch!

vivekk · 08-07-2007, 05:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beauforty

Viv, firstly that's disgusting!! You have a filthy mind, unlike Graham. He's extremely clean...

Secondly, Graham is a Gloucestershire Old Spot while you've posted a British Lop so the picture is clearly a fake...!

Whoops!

There you go Paul- Graham the EDIT-Gloucester Old Spot!

Viv

mjh93sa · 08-07-2007, 05:21 PM

It's Gloucester Old Spot, not Gloucestershire.

The Gloucester Old Spot is also a decent pub

ShereKhan · 08-07-2007, 05:31 PM

The question i'd expect from Carlos is can he upgrade the torch with xenons?

booforty · 08-07-2007, 05:32 PM

Sorry, I had the pub in mind...

DervFan · 08-07-2007, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivekk

Whoops!

There you go Paul- Graham the EDIT-Gloucester Old Spot!

Viv

That'll be a moment to treasure when he's off to the abattoir, if the F&M outbreak widens

dxb335d · 08-07-2007, 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivekk

Hmmm....the possibilites....endless...

Beauforty will fill that hole...

Better empty...than being full of sh*t...

Hmm....it's just the beginning...

Viv

will he fcuk, have you seen his FFS??? smaller than my nans bean (shrivelled)

i will fill that crater properly

Art Man · 08-08-2007, 05:23 AM

My 3 series came without a torch, so I emailed BMW UK and was told all 2006 (model year I assume) 3 series came without a torch. So I went on Ebay and got one for a couple of quid.

booforty · 08-08-2007, 06:31 AM

Mine was a 2005 (Year 1) build and came with a torch. I would be lost without it...

330cdsport · 08-08-2007, 07:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beauforty

Mine was a 2005 (Year 1) build and came with a torch. I would be lost without it...

You should try using your headlights instead

mjh93sa · 08-08-2007, 08:12 AM

or just open the fridge door

vivekk · 08-08-2007, 08:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mjh93sa

or just open the fridge door

He's too busy making himself a Dandelion & Burdock on his in-car Sodastream, to remember he has a xenon beam in his Bosch!

Viv

booforty · 08-08-2007, 08:58 AM

Jealous of my mods?

MF

vivekk · 08-08-2007, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beauforty

Jealous of my mods?

MF

Paul- some of your mods are quite delicious, whilst some of them make me puke!

Viv

booforty · 08-08-2007, 10:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vivekk

Paul- some of your mods are quite delicious, whilst some of them make me puke!

Viv

What, a Dandelion & Burdock sodastream?

mjh93sa · 08-08-2007, 11:16 AM

Is there a Xenon mod for the torch?
Can you get the switch lowered?

dxb335d · 08-08-2007, 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mjh93sa

Is there a Xenon mod for the torch?
Can you get the switch lowered?

and can you either re-map or procede the torch??

can you torch the torch?

booforty · 08-08-2007, 11:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dxb335d

and can you either re-map or procede the torch??

can you torch the torch?

Yes, Yes, Yes... and there's a new M torch coming out in the autumn, expeted to be brighter than the previous M torch...

vivekk · 08-08-2007, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beauforty

What, a Dandelion & Burdock sodastream?

I thought that was your favourite tipple, with the 'old dears' ?!

Quote:

Originally Posted by mjh93sa

Is there a Xenon mod for the torch?
Can you get the switch lowered?

Quote:

Originally Posted by dxb335d

and can you either re-map or procede the torch??

can you torch the torch?

Quote:

Originally Posted by beauforty

Yes, Yes, Yes... and there's a new M torch coming out in the autumn, expeted to be brighter than the previous M torch...

Below is a leaked shot of the new BMW M-Torch, due for release in week 36 of this year, apparently.

The 5 xenon bulbs are probably bright enough to blind any unsuspecting passer-by, which explains the torch having to be photographed in the off position.

The on/off switch can be lowered into the 'on' position & can also be lifted into the off state.

Posts on talkcrapaboutbmwtorches.com suggest that a 3rd-party provider will have a re-map available to allow the torch to produce a 12K beam in excess of 5000 lumens.

The new BMW 'TuffNut' alloy used to build the casing, is rumoured to be able to withstand 2 fat ladies sitting on it for anywhere upto 3 minutes- unbelievable. This also makes this torch completely untorchable.

The only downside to this new device is the fact that it will require a battery the size of Graham the pig, and, in Paul's own words, '...Graham is no small porker...'

Viv

silverbmwz3 · 08-08-2007, 02:46 PM

Does my car have a torch?! Perhaps I should take a look. It's got a nice set of Xenons on the front I know that much.

08-07-2007, 05:21 PM	#46
mjh93sa Major General 150 Rep 5,080 Posts Drives: 530d Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Gloucestershire iTrader: (0) Garage List 2012 BMW M135i [10.00] 2011 Mini Countryma ... [5.50]	It's Gloucester Old Spot, not Gloucestershire. The Gloucester Old Spot is also a decent pub __________________ Gone: Fiesta - Focus - E46 320dSE - E91 330dMSport - E82 135iMSport - R55 JCW Clubman - M135i Now: 530d
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08-07-2007, 05:31 PM	#47
ShereKhan Major 101 Rep 1,134 Posts Drives: BMW G20 330e M Sport MY20 Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: Bristol, UK iTrader: (0) Garage List 2020 BMW 330e [0.00]	The question i'd expect from Carlos is can he upgrade the torch with xenons?
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08-07-2007, 05:32 PM	#48
booforty Major General 366 Rep 8,809 Posts Drives: E92 M3 Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: London, UK iTrader: (0) Garage List 2008 E92 M3 [0.00]	Sorry, I had the pub in mind...
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08-08-2007, 05:23 AM	#51
Art Man Private First Class 3 Rep 119 Posts Drives: 320D SE Join Date: Oct 2006 Location: Midlands, England iTrader: (0)	My 3 series came without a torch, so I emailed BMW UK and was told all 2006 (model year I assume) 3 series came without a torch. So I went on Ebay and got one for a couple of quid.
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08-08-2007, 06:31 AM	#52
booforty Major General 366 Rep 8,809 Posts Drives: E92 M3 Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: London, UK iTrader: (0) Garage List 2008 E92 M3 [0.00]	Mine was a 2005 (Year 1) build and came with a torch. I would be lost without it...
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08-08-2007, 08:12 AM	#54
mjh93sa Major General 150 Rep 5,080 Posts Drives: 530d Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Gloucestershire iTrader: (0) Garage List 2012 BMW M135i [10.00] 2011 Mini Countryma ... [5.50]	or just open the fridge door __________________ Gone: Fiesta - Focus - E46 320dSE - E91 330dMSport - E82 135iMSport - R55 JCW Clubman - M135i Now: 530d
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08-08-2007, 08:58 AM	#56
booforty Major General 366 Rep 8,809 Posts Drives: E92 M3 Join Date: Mar 2005 Location: London, UK iTrader: (0) Garage List 2008 E92 M3 [0.00]	Jealous of my mods? MF
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08-08-2007, 11:16 AM	#59
mjh93sa Major General 150 Rep 5,080 Posts Drives: 530d Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Gloucestershire iTrader: (0) Garage List 2012 BMW M135i [10.00] 2011 Mini Countryma ... [5.50]	Is there a Xenon mod for the torch? Can you get the switch lowered? __________________ Gone: Fiesta - Focus - E46 320dSE - E91 330dMSport - E82 135iMSport - R55 JCW Clubman - M135i Now: 530d
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08-08-2007, 02:46 PM	#63
silverbmwz3 Colonel 55 Rep 2,022 Posts Drives: X5 g05 Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Buckinghamshire, UK iTrader: (0) Garage List 2003 325 ci SE conv ... [0.00]	Does my car have a torch?! Perhaps I should take a look. It's got a nice set of Xenons on the front I know that much. __________________ Current: E90 335d (May 2007) \| Black/Black \| Prof Hifi \| Prof Nav \| 6FL \| Fully Electric Seats \| Xenons \| Folding Mirrors \| PDC Previous: 325ci Conv. Black/Black with lots of ACS Previous: z3 3.0 Silver with Black&Red Leather
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