The stupidest things we did to get laid....

Dang3r · 09-29-2016, 09:20 AM

That reminds me to a story which happend several years ago and this is no joke: Mid of the 90th a few guys and me went into Hamburg over St. Pauli and the famous Reeperbahn. After a few turns we'd decided to enter a bar which name was "Amiga Bar". The ladies inside were entirely asian style and I would tell a lie if I would state that only one of them was not totally hot.
So, we sat down at a table, three chicks were approaching and asking about drinks. We'd ordered some and stated, that one of us was having birthday that day. Now: Two went away to get our drinks and the third was instantly kneeing down, slips under the table and the next thing we're awaring was the slightly blushing face of the birthday dude, which belt and trousers gets open quickly and a black haired head gave a very impressive blow job

Right, after short cheering we're looking more discreetly aside into the crowd to let him more enjoy his present - as long as he started to scream! As we turned back we were seeing a shemale with an erected longdong into that size, that you'll need a pair of hands to cover it...
The rest is really history

nyalpine90 · 09-29-2016, 09:24 AM

hangover scene!

brianeck · 09-29-2016, 09:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Axius

Dude..., you kissed a dude!

I think grimlock also was enamored with a tranny at one point too! You're like eskimo brothers!

She had a nice pair of balls on her too.

UncleWede · 09-29-2016, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brianeck

She had a nice pair of balls on her too.

But at least you walked home once realized. Grimy is STILL asking us how to chat "her" up

Aatish · 09-29-2016, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by UncleWede

But at least you walked home once realized. Grimy is STILL asking us how to chat "her" up

Mr Tonka · 09-29-2016, 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brianeck

She had a nice pair of balls on her too.

You should have let her/him PIITB.

///M Power-Belgium · 09-29-2016, 12:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by brianeck

She had a nice pair of balls on her too.

I see your situation...

NEFARIOUS · 10-03-2016, 06:51 AM

I pretended to be all about admiring the French, French culture and cuisine to land an FWB... I surprised I got far enough with just useless trivia

UncleWede · 10-03-2016, 11:34 AM

^ bonjour

Dang3r · 10-04-2016, 09:24 AM

au preservoir

jtodd_fl · 10-04-2016, 01:52 PM

I think he was going for something more like menage a trois.

RunFlatOut · 10-14-2016, 09:31 AM

Once joined a fringe activist political party and ended up shouting bullshit and waving banners without knowing what was written just because I really wanted to get off with that pretty blonde recruiter. Then it went from weird to weirder, with her getting me to attend this conference with their revered thought leader type dude droning on and on about everything being the state's fault while all I could think of was the the blonde recruiter actually looked kinda weird when you were up close, plus she actually made my skin crawl a little whenever she talked to me, she had those spooky eyes where the glint is purely lit by her excitement at drawing you in to do stuff for the team. Never got to the humping part and kinda glad I didn't to this day, and her total absence in any of my fantasies since then comforts me in having chosen to get out of there and to use my right hand doing more enjoyable things than waving a signpost.

Alvinized52 · 10-14-2016, 09:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RunFlatOut

Once joined a fringe activist political party and ended up shouting bullshit and waving banners without knowing what was written just because I really wanted to get off with that pretty blonde recruiter. Then it went from weird to weirder, with her getting me to attend this conference with their revered thought leader type dude droning on and on about everything being the state's fault while all I could think of was the the blonde recruiter actually looked kinda weird when you were up close, plus she actually made my skin crawl a little whenever she talked to me, she had those spooky eyes where the glint is purely lit by her excitement at drawing you in to do stuff for the team. Never got to the humping part and kinda glad I didn't to this day, and her total absence in any of my fantasies since then comforts me in having chosen to get out of there and to use my right hand doing more enjoyable things than waving a signpost.

What the hell is wrong with you?! If,that were me.... After all that work and sacrifice, i would have fucked her any way before walking a way with an even bigger smile. And with No regrets

RunFlatOut · 10-14-2016, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alvinized52

What the hell is wrong with you?! If,that were me.... After all that work and sacrifice, i would have fucked her any way before walking a way with an even bigger smile. And with No regrets

Dude have you ever been among sect people? That stuff kills boners faster and harder than any two girls sharing a cup ever will. Yeah sure you start off thinking rock on, working my way into those panties. Then it gets fucking creepy. These women don't emit pheromones that talk to your nuts, they emit signals that if you don't comply with their demands you will be in deep shit. It's subtle but the message is there. Plus all they want is to worship the thought leader hive mind ruler and offer their bodies to him for the cause. You are nothing but an expendable worker ant.

Aatish · 10-14-2016, 10:02 AM

As soon as she starts deeply talking politics/religion, dip.

UncleWede · 10-14-2016, 01:01 PM

Can't recall, did I miss "Joined a commune" or "went on tour with the Dead"?

Alvinized52 · 10-15-2016, 12:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RunFlatOut

Dude have you ever been among sect people? That stuff kills boners faster and harder than any two girls sharing a cup ever will. Yeah sure you start off thinking rock on, working my way into those panties. Then it gets fucking creepy. These women don't emit pheromones that talk to your nuts, they emit signals that if you don't comply with their demands you will be in deep shit. It's subtle but the message is there. Plus all they want is to worship the thought leader hive mind ruler and offer their bodies to him for the cause. You are nothing but an expendable worker ant.

Yes I have. You have much to learn my young Padawan...

RunFlatOut · 10-15-2016, 06:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alvinized52

Yes I have. You have much to learn my young Padawan...

That I do. But Palpatine still whooped your little green ass

InternetFame · 10-19-2016, 12:31 PM

Paging silvergray545 too lazy to see what you put in this shit.

silvergray545 · 10-19-2016, 12:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by InternetFame

Paging silvergray545 too lazy to see what you put in this shit.

Man, why you gotta call me out like that?

InternetFame · 10-19-2016, 12:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by silvergray545

Man, why you gotta call me out like that?

Because we both have stories for this, I'm just letting you go first. I'll have to type mine in a Word document first.

silvergray545 · 10-19-2016, 12:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by InternetFame

Because we both have stories for this, I'm just letting you go first. I'll have to type mine in a Word document first.

Part of me doesn't want any written proof that anything actually happened.

09-29-2016, 09:20 AM	#243
Dang3r Schmollbraten 12482 Rep 1,985 Posts Drives: M4CPC // HP4 Comp. Join Date: Jun 2015 Location: Liandri Central Core iTrader: (0)	That reminds me to a story which happend several years ago and this is no joke: Mid of the 90th a few guys and me went into Hamburg over St. Pauli and the famous Reeperbahn. After a few turns we'd decided to enter a bar which name was "Amiga Bar". The ladies inside were entirely asian style and I would tell a lie if I would state that only one of them was not totally hot. So, we sat down at a table, three chicks were approaching and asking about drinks. We'd ordered some and stated, that one of us was having birthday that day. Now: Two went away to get our drinks and the third was instantly kneeing down, slips under the table and the next thing we're awaring was the slightly blushing face of the birthday dude, which belt and trousers gets open quickly and a black haired head gave a very impressive blow job Right, after short cheering we're looking more discreetly aside into the crowd to let him more enjoy his present - as long as he started to scream! As we turned back we were seeing a shemale with an erected longdong into that size, that you'll need a pair of hands to cover it... The rest is really history __________________ Citizen of ///M - Town, where too much is just right Some say, that my scrotum has its own small gravity field and when Im slowing down that brake lights come on at my buttox
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09-29-2016, 09:24 AM	#244
nyalpine90 Lieutenant General 7552 Rep 11,936 Posts Drives: MY24 G01 AW Msport Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: L.I. NY iTrader: (4) Garage List 2016 BMW X4 [9.25]	hangover scene!
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10-03-2016, 11:34 AM	#251
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18458 Rep 9,428 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	^ bonjour
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10-04-2016, 09:24 AM	#252
Dang3r Schmollbraten 12482 Rep 1,985 Posts Drives: M4CPC // HP4 Comp. Join Date: Jun 2015 Location: Liandri Central Core iTrader: (0)	au preservoir __________________ Citizen of ///M - Town, where too much is just right Some say, that my scrotum has its own small gravity field and when Im slowing down that brake lights come on at my buttox
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10-04-2016, 01:52 PM	#253
jtodd_fl 2nd Asst to Dept Undersecretary 6709 Rep 1,298 Posts Drives: People crazy Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: Florida iTrader: (0) Garage List 2015 F82 M4 [9.00] 2016 F87 M2 [0.00] 2011 E92 M3 [0.00]	I think he was going for something more like menage a trois. __________________ This space for rent.
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10-14-2016, 09:31 AM	#254
RunFlatOut Private First Class 82 Rep 136 Posts Drives: 2008 BMW E92 330d coupe Join Date: Dec 2014 Location: Europe iTrader: (0)	Once joined a fringe activist political party and ended up shouting bullshit and waving banners without knowing what was written just because I really wanted to get off with that pretty blonde recruiter. Then it went from weird to weirder, with her getting me to attend this conference with their revered thought leader type dude droning on and on about everything being the state's fault while all I could think of was the the blonde recruiter actually looked kinda weird when you were up close, plus she actually made my skin crawl a little whenever she talked to me, she had those spooky eyes where the glint is purely lit by her excitement at drawing you in to do stuff for the team. Never got to the humping part and kinda glad I didn't to this day, and her total absence in any of my fantasies since then comforts me in having chosen to get out of there and to use my right hand doing more enjoyable things than waving a signpost.
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10-14-2016, 10:02 AM	#257
Aatish Lofty 3476 Rep 849 Posts Drives: i4 M50, 991.2 C2, RRS Diesel Join Date: Dec 2013 Location: ORD <> ATX iTrader: (0)	As soon as she starts deeply talking politics/religion, dip. __________________ F30 335 (FBO and BM3 OG) 991.2 C2 Range Rover Sport Diesel I4 M50 (coming soon)
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10-14-2016, 01:01 PM	#258
UncleWede Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner 18458 Rep 9,428 Posts Drives: G01 X3 M40i Dark Graphite Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Oxnard, CA iTrader: (0)	Can't recall, did I miss "Joined a commune" or "went on tour with the Dead"?
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10-19-2016, 12:31 PM	#261
InternetFame Banned 553 Rep 228 Posts Drives: '17 F80 ZCP 6MT, '11 R55 S 6MT Join Date: Oct 2016 Location: DMV iTrader: (0)	Paging silvergray545 too lazy to see what you put in this shit.
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