[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

i walked into this thread to see some potential red flags and what to look out for in interviews given i'm just beginning that journey.

so tip 1: don't fart, if the interviewer farts just let it slide
tip 2: if you absolutely must, have sex with your interviewer a few days before they replace their surveillance system

Keep these in mind and you'll go far in life.

If you'd like some inside on how I used to interview and what I looked for PM me.

[dzvero]

is this qualify

[Sea-Tac]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

Not the case at all my good man. She received good "marks" for her efforts. It's a shame she didn't want the job, she was not afraid to go after what she wanted.

....at the same time, after that I couldn't have hired her....although I did keep her on my staff for a while.

...kept her on your staff...

Well, all work and no play makes Not_Judy a dull boy!

[dzvero]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

I am very reluctant to post this....

I used to be the manager of a business located next to a nail salon. Several of the girls from the nail salon next door used to come over in between customers and hang out/talk with either myself or my sales reps. One of the girls was interested in a job opening but her shift didn't end until we were closed. She continued to show interest almost daily for about a week. I eventually told her I would stay late one night and discuss the position with her, requirements, expectations, etc. not so much a formal interview but more of just explaining how everything worked.

After about 15 minutes, I found out very quickly that she wasn't really interested in a job. I am not at liberty to explain the events that transpired for the next hour but I will say it was the best "interview" I ever conducted.

who was speechless you or she

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by dzvero

who was speechless you or she

At first I was when she showed me her lack of undergarments sitting directly across from me.

She laughed at how uncomfortable I was.

[MrSmartyPants]

I'm in engineering and one question we ask to some candidates, for several reasons, is "how does a toilet work?"

Holy shit does this stump people. Typically if someone is mechanically adept they get it, no problem. If not we like to see how they work through it. We will even help.

Some answers are gems though.

One person who supposedly had 10-15 years of MRO (maintenance, repair & operations) experience and worked on large capital projects said "you pull the lever and it goes down a black hole". Uh huh, yep.

Another guy had no idea beyond float and lever. But did say his toilet was overflowing once and so he pulled the top cover and held up the float to stop the water flowing. He did this for over an hour waiting for his landlord. I kindly informed him the little valve on the wall shuts off water to the toilet.

Neither were hired.

[MrRoboto]

Originally Posted by Never_Enough

Let's share job interview nonsense stories. I spoke to a potential new suitor on the phone today. It was the founder/CEO. He tells me he closes 100% of the calls/meetings he goes on.

Look, man, we all wanna think we are awesome, but no one closes 100% in sales. Join us in reality.

Then, later in the conversation, he says they close about 3/4.

FFS

A good leader will always hire people who are smarter/better then they are or the company will not grow. That person sounds like an arrogant twit.

[MrRoboto]

Originally Posted by MrSmartyPants

I'm in engineering and one question we ask to some candidates, for several reasons, is "how does a toilet work?"

Holy shit does this stump people. Typically if someone is mechanically adept they get it, no problem. If not we like to see how they work through it. We will even help.

Some answers are gems though.

One person who supposedly had 10-15 years of MRO (maintenance, repair & operations) experience and worked on large capital projects said "you pull the lever and it goes down a black hole". Uh huh, yep.

Another guy had no idea beyond float and lever. But did say his toilet was overflowing once and so he pulled the top cover and held up the float to stop the water flowing. He did this for over an hour waiting for his landlord. I kindly informed him the little valve on the wall shuts off water to the toilet.

Neither were hired.

Custodial Engineer?

[Caffeine Powered]

I get a kick out of contractors looking to fill positions in Kuwait, Afghanistan and Iraq offering me 75% of what I currently make stateside.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Caffeine Powered

I get a kick out of contractors looking to fill positions in Kuwait, Afghanistan and Iraq offering me 75% of what I currently make stateside.

is your office looking for a summer intern? potentially a young boy studying in civil engineering?

[MrSmartyPants]

Originally Posted by MrRoboto

Custodial Engineer?

Nope. Design/Product/Project/Mfg Engineer.

You'd be surprised how many people go into those fields only because they heard it was a good job and really have no mechanical background or intuition.

[Caffeine Powered]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

is your office looking for a summer intern? potentially a young boy studying in civil engineering?

No, I'm a licensed electrician. Here's the most recent email.

[JohnnyCanuck]

I've used this video in training sessions for our HR Staff ...

[Ross61]

Originally Posted by MrSmartyPants

I'm in engineering and one question we ask to some candidates, for several reasons, is "how does a toilet work?"

Holy shit does this stump people. Typically if someone is mechanically adept they get it, no problem. If not we like to see how they work through it. We will even help.

Some answers are gems though.

One person who supposedly had 10-15 years of MRO (maintenance, repair & operations) experience and worked on large capital projects said "you pull the lever and it goes down a black hole". Uh huh, yep.

Another guy had no idea beyond float and lever. But did say his toilet was overflowing once and so he pulled the top cover and held up the float to stop the water flowing. He did this for over an hour waiting for his landlord. I kindly informed him the little valve on the wall shuts off water to the toilet.

Neither were hired.

Our question was "you're on top a small hill and there is a lake at the bottom, how do you get water from the lake to the top of the hill?"

The most innovative was the guy who said he'd use an auger to pull the water up.

The best was "well I would use explosives to completely level the hill. I am a retired Marine after all." He had the most entertaining interview though sadly, did not get job. Seems while he was in the Marines he earned "three metals" for his service - this was a tech writing job.

[Germanauto]

Resident Physician interview seasons is upon us.

So far nothing crazy besides the same exaggerated BS every program makes their Residents say..."our Attending Docs are so cool, you can text them at any time, everybody is sooo supportive" yada yada. Sure it may be true, but when I hear the same stuff from every Hospital it's bound to not be true at all of them.

I'm very early in my career compared to most of ya'll so haven't seen much.

[Germanauto]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

She got nailed and my desk got painted.....along with the conference table, one the chairs at the table and carpet in front of my desk.

Extremely unprofessional on my part however, she was only curious in the job so she could find a reason to talk. When she sat in front of me in her mini-skirt and made it VERY obvious what her intentions were, is ONLY when I took the bait. I would like to add that under no circumstance whatsoever would I ever make a move like that during an interview.....however, it is what it is.

Damn bro you lived everybody's PornHub fantasy.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Caffeine Powered

No, I'm a licensed electrician. Here's the most recent email.

oh i see, thanks still!
"Ability to leave in 4-5 weeks" sounds intensive tbh, do they just assume people don't have lives?

[Caffeine Powered]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

oh i see, thanks still!
"Ability to leave in 4-5 weeks" sounds intensive tbh, do they just assume people don't have lives?

I could leave in a day. Maybe that's a byproduct of thirteen years in the Army, but it speaks more to my wife being able to do without me. Our daughter is in Tokyo so there's no family stress.

I'd put the E92 on the trickle charger but my wife would probably drive it while I'm away.

[zx10guy]

Worst interview I've been on.

It was just after I graduated college. Had an interview with a telecom company. It was for a computer support position. The prescreen was a test I had to take and pass administered at their office. I go to take the test and to my surprise, there wasn't a lick of anything "computer" related. It was all around serial communications. So I attempted to do my best on the test with only a piece of scratch paper, pen, and calculator they provided. I left thinking well....so much for the job.

A day or so later I get a call from the HR guy. He said they wanted me to come in to formally interview with a couple of guys; one of whom is the hiring manager. I was shocked. I thought for sure I failed the test. The HR guy said I did well on the test. So I go in for the interview. The interview with the first guy went well. Nothing much to really say there. Then I sit down with the hiring manager. This is where things go down the crapper. He starts off pleasant and then pulls out the test I had taken. He's looking at it and puts it down. He then starts questioning me about the test in a very accusative manner. He asked again if I had any experience with serial communications. I said no. He then says he doesn't understand how someone with no experience could "ace" his test. He said passing for the test was 60. I looked at my marked up test which was sitting in plain view in front of me on his desk. The score written on the test was 78. I then explain I used my knowledge of computers and engineering education (I graduated with a BS in Materials Science Engineering) to answer the questions. He kept going back to the fact I did so well on a test written with the intent of finding people with the level of experience they were looking for; insinuating I had somehow cheated on the test. Then he goes on about what guarantee I would stay in the job for any appreciable period since it was obvious I was intelligent enough to do well on something I had no experience or training. Needless to say I can tell I wasn't getting the job. I was escorted to a waiting area and after a few minutes, the HR guy shows up and escorts me to the elevator. I can tell from the look on his face he had a chat with the hiring manager and knew I wasn't getting the job. The HR guy liked me and was showing he didn't like the decision.

A few days later I received notification I didn't get the job and they had hired an internal candidate. No shock there. So I move on with life. A few years later, I was taking a programming class at night at a local community college. I had a small talk chat with the guy sitting next to me. Find out he works for the above said company. I mentioned my interview nightmare and mentioned the name of the manager. He laughs and said he knows him. Said he was a jerk and a few months after my interview the company let him go. Karma.

[F30lolz]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

If they put salt or pepper on their food before they tasted it, it was an instant no regardless of how the rest of the conversation went.

What about hot sauce? Do you discriminate against that?

As others have mentioned, I’ve been asked about my age and if I were married. Funny how I’ve been asked that maybe 5ive times and in all those positions after the first two minutes I knew the job wasn’t for me so I lied and was being a smart ass:

Interviewer at one of these jobs - How old are you?
Me - I was born in 1978, do the math. I’ve also answered, ‘young enough to be your son.’

Are you married?
Five times, I needed to bang more woman.
No, I like to spread my wings and fly.
Yes, we’ve been together since we were seven.

[Maynard]

My favorite Q for the aspiring interns/residents: What question are you most hoping I don't ask you? I also pay huge attention to how they treat patients, office staff, and each other when 'nobody is looking' (favorite quote "I'll be nice to those people when they are paying me to do it").

I'm gonna miss interview season (not!) - I'd rather be panhandled by lepers than put up with the incessant brown-nosing.

[Turkish Pickle]

im slightly confused, why is asking age or marital status illegal?