[upstatedoc]

I get agita watching Syracuse basketball

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

This isn't a confession as much as a rant. I am a CASA Advocate and frustrated with my case. DCFS is a shit show. I honestly don't know how we haven't overhauled this organization and allow them to have so much power over kids lives. I've been on a case since October 2020. My case just got assigned a new worker who admitted she hasn't read the full file and has only seen the child in person once. I shared with her what I was going to testify in court she said I won't agree with that. You admitted you don't even have all the facts and only have seen the child once but yet you know what's best???? The sad thing is even if the judge agrees with me she can only recommend to DCFS to make a change. DCFS is the one who makes the decisions. Kids deserve better people fighting for them.
*I know not all DCFS workers are bad but hell I haven't had a good track record with the ones I've come across.

Damn, that sounds terrible! Hope it gets resolved in the way it benefits the child.

Sadly not surprised people half ass that though, been watching the documentary on Gabriel Fernandez and it's absolutely horrible how people blatantly refused to do something at all.

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

Damn, that sounds terrible! Hope it gets resolved in the way it benefits the child.

Sadly not surprised people half ass that though, been watching the documentary on Gabriel Fernandez and it's absolutely horrible how people blatantly refused to do something at all.

It did not end well. The grandfather attacked me personally on the phone and I'm resigning tomorrow. The system is extremely broken and I feel like I'm not making a difference. The DCFS worker who hasn't even been on the case a month and a half just stirred up a bunch of shit and made things awful. I don't need this drama in my life. I want to help but when you feel like you're just speaking to speak and it holds no gravity, what's the point?

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

It did not end well. The grandfather attacked me personally on the phone and I'm resigning tomorrow. The system is extremely broken and I feel like I'm not making a difference. The DCFS worker who hasn't even been on the case a month and a half just stirred up a bunch of shit and made things awful. I don't need this drama in my life. I want to help but when you feel like you're just speaking to speak and it holds no gravity, what's the point?

That's so unfortunate. I'm really sorry and I empathize with you. What will be your employment back-up plan?

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

That's so unfortunate. I'm really sorry and I empathize with you. What will be your employment back-up plan?

This is solely volunteer. I don't make any money and this is not associated at all with my actual job.

I'm just so upset. I really don't understand how a social worker gets to have so much authority. This one doesn't even know the entire case and formed a decision. That's not ok. It's not objective. One person gets to be the deciding factor on a child's life. There should be a panel of at least 3 people looking at it objectively. I'm just frustrated and venting.

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

This is solely volunteer. I don't make any money and this is not associated at all with my actual job.

I'm just so upset. I really don't understand how a social worker gets to have so much authority. This one doesn't even know the entire case and formed a decision. That's not ok. It's not objective. One person gets to be the deciding factor on a child's life. There should be a panel of at least 3 people looking at it objectively. I'm just frustrated and venting.

Vent away. We're listening. In my experience with DCFS, they either do too much/don't know enough or they do little to nothing at all.

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Vent away. We're listening. In my experience with DCFS, they either do too much/don't know enough or they do little to nothing at all.

Thank you, we will see how it goes tomorrow when I resign.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

It did not end well. The grandfather attacked me personally on the phone and I'm resigning tomorrow. The system is extremely broken and I feel like I'm not making a difference. The DCFS worker who hasn't even been on the case a month and a half just stirred up a bunch of shit and made things awful. I don't need this drama in my life. I want to help but when you feel like you're just speaking to speak and it holds no gravity, what's the point?

This is truly sad to read. Disheartening.

[BMWGUYinCO]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

This is solely volunteer. I don't make any money and this is not associated at all with my actual job.

I'm just so upset. I really don't understand how a social worker gets to have so much authority. This one doesn't even know the entire case and formed a decision. That's not ok. It's not objective. One person gets to be the deciding factor on a child's life. There should be a panel of at least 3 people looking at it objectively. I'm just frustrated and venting.

You know, in our society we glorify athletes and musicians every moment on TV, social media, etc.....

But real heroes (front line workers, teachers, volunteers such as yourself on behalf of children especially and many more I am not even mentioning here) get token appreciation.

Sorry you are trying and not being heard. Here is a story with an opposite twist, but the same problem.

17 years ago, our neighbors adopted a highly at risk 2 year old girl. She had parents who were drug addicts and beat her. Our neighbors are the nicest people we know....but the child grew up with severe behavioral issues, often violently attacking (with knives and other harmful objects) the natural siblings and her adopted parents. She cursed out teachers and other adults, destroyed property, etc. The parents did everything they could including years of counseling, - they even spent $150,000 on a program that deals with children with severe issues. Nothing worked, I think the poor child's brain was damaged by abuse.

But here's the thing - DCFS got involved and starting levying charges against the parents because the girl would literally break a window inside their home and run away. The parents were charged with abuse or abandonment of a child and actually ended up in court because of the case worker levying these charges. We would often see police vehicles in front of our house because the neighbors had to start documenting proof of what was going on (they wanted the police to see that they were not harming the child, and that the child was out of control - she once bit and fought a police officer trying to calm her down). This must have happened at least a dozen times.

End of story - the girl is now almost 18 and hasn't been home in months. The parents did have to go to court, but because they had to amassed so much evidence that they were not harming or kicking the child out, the judge immediately dismissed all charges against them....but again, all because the DCFS case worker wasn't taking the time to understand the situation.

It was really hard on that family - it almost tore them all apart. The natural siblings had issues because of all the attention the problematic adopted child was given, - their marriage suffered...

[rebekahb]

BMWGUYinCO thank you for sharing that story with me. It is truly sad what that young girl witnessed and experienced at such a young age. People do not give enough credit to children that young that those experiences can/might affect their emotional outcome as they age. I can't even imagine how tough it was for that family who wanted to do a good thing but in turn it turned their world/family upside down. I don't think we make or have enough resources available. Mental health is severely underserved in the United States on various levels.

As far as DCFS, I don't know what goes through their head at times. I will say that they see a lot of the worst in adults when it comes to abuse to children and what they experience. I do give them grace from the standpoint that it is a taxing line of work. When you lose objectivity or the ability to see a situation for what it is, it is time to change your line of work. I say this from the standpoint of them being in charge of a childs life. This is where CASA is important from an advocate standpoint. They are brought in on cases because we typically only have 1 and are able to spend time doing things that DCFS might not have the time to do due to their case load. It should be a collaborative approach for the best of the child. Often times, they see us as threats especially when we testify in court that the child has not had their needs met by DCFS or we see things that may not align with DCFS's stance on that child. It's a lot.

As far as me resigning, I called my supervisor this morning and spoke with her at length. She asked me to think about it over the weekend and talk again on Monday. The sad part about all of this is the foster parent wants the person who is caring for the child (family) to continue to bond with them and help raise the child. The foster parent wants to keep the title that he adopted the child. It's completely selfish. My conversation last night was all I, I, I, I, I from the foster parent not lets look at what's best for the child.

[BMWGUYinCO]

rebekahb

Your supervisor is taking a good approach - she wants you to take some time and think about this over a few days because they clearly value what you are doing, and don't want to lose you over the heat of the moment.

I admire what you are doing - not only is it on behalf of children, but it's also on a volunteer basis..."angels among us" as I say (and I am in healthcare but on the non-clinician side).

Good luck with your decision, I know it's hard but you should do what's right by you as well. And, I'm sure I speak on behalf of many others here when I say your extended BMW family is here for you! Hope you head into a more positive weekend.

[UncleWede]

It's not much to offer, but tonight I will be mixing up a special margarita in Angel rebekahb 's name

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

It's not much to offer, but tonight I will be mixing up a special margarita in Angel rebekahb 's name

I'm rocking a "Be Like Rebekah" sticky on my uniform today as I roll to this suspected child abuse call.

[Darth One]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

BMWGUYinCO thank you for sharing that story with me. It is truly sad what that young girl witnessed and experienced at such a young age. People do not give enough credit to children that young that those experiences can/might affect their emotional outcome as they age. I can't even imagine how tough it was for that family who wanted to do a good thing but in turn it turned their world/family upside down. I don't think we make or have enough resources available. Mental health is severely underserved in the United States on various levels.

As far as DCFS, I don't know what goes through their head at times. I will say that they see a lot of the worst in adults when it comes to abuse to children and what they experience. I do give them grace from the standpoint that it is a taxing line of work. When you lose objectivity or the ability to see a situation for what it is, it is time to change your line of work. I say this from the standpoint of them being in charge of a childs life. This is where CASA is important from an advocate standpoint. They are brought in on cases because we typically only have 1 and are able to spend time doing things that DCFS might not have the time to do due to their case load. It should be a collaborative approach for the best of the child. Often times, they see us as threats especially when we testify in court that the child has not had their needs met by DCFS or we see things that may not align with DCFS's stance on that child. It's a lot.

As far as me resigning, I called my supervisor this morning and spoke with her at length. She asked me to think about it over the weekend and talk again on Monday. The sad part about all of this is the foster parent wants the person who is caring for the child (family) to continue to bond with them and help raise the child. The foster parent wants to keep the title that he adopted the child. It's completely selfish. My conversation last night was all I, I, I, I, I from the foster parent not lets look at what's best for the child.

That’s really upsetting that people like you who have advocacy skills that can benefit kids and are willing to provide these skills pro bono, are being driven away by bullshit

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

I'm rocking a "Be Like Rebekah" sticky on my uniform today as I roll to this suspected child abuse call.

BLR

Could cause some confusion with the uniform

[Sedan_Clan]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

BLR

Could cause some confusion with the uniform

Naw, because they'll think it means, "Black Lives Reign" or some other dumb ass interpretation.

[TiMSport]

Originally Posted by Sedan_Clan

Naw, because they'll think it means, "Black Lives Reign" or some other dumb ass interpretation.

Big Long Ramrod

[wtwo3]

I'm busy AF.

My last job paid me to just show up. At my current job these assholes actually expect me to do work. The nerve.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

BMWGUYinCO thank you for sharing that story with me. It is truly sad what that young girl witnessed and experienced at such a young age. People do not give enough credit to children that young that those experiences can/might affect their emotional outcome as they age. I can't even imagine how tough it was for that family who wanted to do a good thing but in turn it turned their world/family upside down. I don't think we make or have enough resources available. Mental health is severely underserved in the United States on various levels.

As far as DCFS, I don't know what goes through their head at times. I will say that they see a lot of the worst in adults when it comes to abuse to children and what they experience. I do give them grace from the standpoint that it is a taxing line of work. When you lose objectivity or the ability to see a situation for what it is, it is time to change your line of work. I say this from the standpoint of them being in charge of a childs life. This is where CASA is important from an advocate standpoint. They are brought in on cases because we typically only have 1 and are able to spend time doing things that DCFS might not have the time to do due to their case load. It should be a collaborative approach for the best of the child. Often times, they see us as threats especially when we testify in court that the child has not had their needs met by DCFS or we see things that may not align with DCFS's stance on that child. It's a lot.

As far as me resigning, I called my supervisor this morning and spoke with her at length. She asked me to think about it over the weekend and talk again on Monday. The sad part about all of this is the foster parent wants the person who is caring for the child (family) to continue to bond with them and help raise the child. The foster parent wants to keep the title that he adopted the child. It's completely selfish. My conversation last night was all I, I, I, I, I from the foster parent not lets look at what's best for the child.

How are you doing - where is your head at? I know you still have the weekend, hoping you do what's right for you. It may be that this isn't it, but that there is a more effective way you can help kids (and be a giant thorn in DCFS side too as an added bonus), or maybe this is the best avenue and you just need a little mental break and then get back to it.

[beachBmmr]

Today I discovered a missing bolt on my caliper bolts that hold the front caliper to the front knuckle. Yea op bolt was finger loose.

Drove like that since last track day last month.

Jesus must have been at the wheel

😬

[IllSic_Design]

Originally Posted by beachBmmr

Today I discovered a missing bolt on my caliper bolts that hold the front caliper to the front knuckle. Yea op bolt was finger loose.

Drove like that since last track day last month.

Jesus must have been at the wheel

😬

WOW! You got very lucky for sure, that usually ends badly with at least a broken rim, if not worse. Jesus definitely took the wheel

[UncleWede]

I removed the rear plate to polish the deck of the bug this morning. Then washed and sealed and took off in a clean machine to run some errands

Came out of the bank, looking at how shiny the whole car was, ESPECIALLY the deck . . . With no plate