[shah269]

BRAISKI
That's what I'm thinking...maybe they got worried about being too old to have kids and just well...grabbed the first dick that smiled?

God i hope they don't have kids....not good...divorce sucks! Divorce for kids is hell.

[cssnms]

From another married guy's perspective... What many of you youngins will learn is, happieness in life is about compromise. Believe it or not, you can do that without sacraficing who you are or what you want out of life.

I know more then my fair share of people that were like many here when they were in their 20's and early 30's, in other words in their "prime" and now they are over the hill, fat, bald and conicidently still single and while they will not admit it, most are lonely - that is the byproduct after all of your friends have settled down, got married and had kids.

Needless to say if they could do it all over again their standards and expectations would be less rigid and lofty.

[shah269]

Yeah....well I'm divorced and 36.
90% of all of my friends are either married or married with kids. Which let me tell you sucks! But hey that is life! We all got married in our late 20's and this is where things go.

Now I like hiking and rock climbing and skiing and all that fun stuff....
If you ask me, marrying or "settling" with a woman who was not athletic and not capable of hanging out with me doing these amazing things would be the first step to a second dirovce.

So i don't know why my chick friends did it. One was an avid mountain biker. She loved it! Everywhere she went she had her bike on the car and was having fun..and her last few boyfriends were just like her. They use to spend every waking moment either screwing or mountain biking!
Well things went south with her last boyfriend, she had a year of being single and now she is married to a guy who due to a birth defect is incapable of riding a bike or being n the woods or pushing his body.
She still has the bike...lookes at it and talks about it....but no longer rides. I can see how dead she looks compred to how happy she use to be.

Why she settled and lowered her standards......I don't know.....is she happy? No.....will she be getting a divorce soon? Yeah...and then she will be 40 and single....

[KingOfJericho]

Originally Posted by shah269

BRAISKI
That's what I'm thinking...maybe they got worried about being too old to have kids and just well...grabbed the first dick that smiled?

God i hope they don't have kids....not good...divorce sucks! Divorce for kids is hell.

Why do you keep making this leap? You're basing this on casual conversations with your 'friends'. Have you ever seen a parent roll their eyes when their kids are acting like maniacs and say "I hate these little devils!" or "why the hell did I have kids?". It's called rhetoric. People say things that they don't mean all the time. Those parents love their kids just as the women you talk to probably really love their husbands. My question is regarding where these comversations occur. Are they telling you this at a BBQ or in direct messages on AshelyMadison or some other dating site that is entirely populated with unhappy, emotionally lonely people?

You also make compromises every day. You probably don't wear a tank top to work or drive any speed you want because you've made some type of compromise. It's an essential element of living a successful life.

Finding a mate with similar interests should not be as difficult as you make it sound. It all comes back to compromise. My ex and I used to have very similar interests. She loved cars and going to concerts, lots of them. Unfortunately she also loved to fight. We lived together and even bought a Lotus together. Even being that rooted in each others lives and interests, it wasn't going to work. I sent her on a spa day and moved all of my stuff out while she was out.

I was 2 minutes out of the parking lot when my phone rang. It was my cousin in Florida just calling to say hi. I told him what I was up to and he said "dude, I have the perfect girl for you!" I told him I wasn't interested so that sneaky fuck gave her my number anyway and she called the next day to just go out as friends as she was new to the area. I reluctantly went along with it. We hung out a few days later and really hit it off. Fast forward 6 years, we're married own a house and a condo and have our first daughter due in six weeks. I couldn't be happier!

Is she into cars? Not really. Does she love rock concerts? Nope. Does she like biking? Not at all. But we get along famously and make each other laugh and smile. THAT is what really matters in a successful relationship.

[shah269]

Look i'm just telling you want i'm seeing and being told....i can't open their brains and check to see if they are lying to me.
They tell me they are not turned on by their husbands, they tell me they want a more outgoing life and well.....they just look sad.
As for the kids thing, i know two fo them were trying to have kids and were going to a doctors for shots and all that fun stuff.

Maybe they are happy and are just complaining for the sake of complaining....i don't know...

[KingOfJericho]

Are they online friends and are these conversations occuring late at night over text or IM?

[kits135i]

I don't concider it setteling. I know I am not a ten so I don't expect a ten. I really don't even care about looks that much. I just care about the person and how they treat me. Thats most important in my opinion.

[sasha1015]

Originally Posted by kits135i

I don't concider it setteling. I know I am not a ten so I don't expect a ten. I really don't even care about looks that much. I just care about the person and how they treat me. Thats most important in my opinion.

To someone out there youre a 10!!! Youll find her

[amanda hor$t]

Originally Posted by kits135i

I don't concider it setteling. I know I am not a ten so I don't expect a ten. I really don't even care about looks that much. I just care about the person and how they treat me. Thats most important in my opinion.

i am not a ten either but i want one/two. lol.

[kits135i]

Originally Posted by R Grubba Balls

i am not a ten either but i want one/two. lol.

I would rather have a one and be loved than have a 8 and deal with her shit.

[amanda hor$t]

Originally Posted by kits135i

I would rather have a one and be loved than have a 8 and deal with her shit.

you still have to be attracted to them, though there's always porn. i've been around some tore up hoes, and let me tell you, your heart might say yes but your dick will say no no no. ie the balls don't lie

[Templar]

Originally Posted by R Grubba Balls

you still have to be attracted to them, though there's always porn. i've been around some tore up hoes, and let me tell you, your heart might say yes but your dick will say no no no. ie the balls don't lie

And for you, there are plenty of hookers.

[F1Venom]

Look. I found an article Shah might be interested in.
http://yahoo.match.com/y/article.asp...nnerID=1461647

[JMX328]

I've been with my currently girlfriend almost 4 years, and I think I will end up settling down with her.

By settling down, I mean getting engaged, married, etc. I'm very happy with her, and I don't think she's below my standards, but I was never much into the 1-through-10 type of thing, so I don't really think of "settling down" as settling below some metric.

I think it worked well for us because she's almost 5 years old than I am (I'm 23, she's 27, turning 28 soon), mature, college graduate, has a good job, and matches my personality and life - I've always been mature, am a college graduate, and have a good job, as well.

We'll have to see how it all works out, though.

[shah269]

JMX by definition you are not "settling". And I really didn't want to use the world "settle" but knew if i said "lower your standards" the usaul fanboys would be here in 30seconds dry humping their keyboards.

“settling” means just giving up and accepting someone in your life who does make you smile every day.
AKA yeah you can bitch about how much you hate your fucking snot nosed kids but in the end you really do love them.
Case in point you indicated she was stable, collage educated and has a career. I take it she doesn’t have a tank ass or a sheet cake top (sheet cake top is when a woman is so lumpy and frumpy that her muffin stop stack and you get two distinct lumps of fat that resemble a sheet cake)

Settling would be if you went for a woman who was not educated, not stable nor employed.

Funny…and I’m now feeding a dead horse into a wood chipper here….but I was hanging out with my engineering friends this weekend and guess what….they are all willing to lower their standards after a given amount of time. At which point I told them they were all fucktards and if they did do such a stupid thing that it would be my god given right to either kill the fuckers or take them down to Colombia and find them a nice mail order Colombian wife! After all….thank the lord above….we men have an out. We don’t have to settle…EVER! If you have the means and the career/education….you can …..and I hate the use of this term….buy into the relationship that will make you happy. Sadly there are not mail order husband web pages.

Some of my chick friends who settled…should have gone that way! Rather than settling with the fat fuck lazy bastards they ended up with…just so thy wouldn’t be alone after 35.

[keepittrill]

Originally Posted by Angerman

settle with your mum

Genius LOL