[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

Maybe this belongs in the old farts thread, but I'd go a step further and recommend that these youngins stop USING texts completely! My personal cell phone plan does not have any free/included text messages, because I don't use it at all. If someone wants to communicate with me, I'm only 10 digits away by voice. As a side benefit, we can both hear each other's emotions.....

You're right, that does belong in the old farts thread.

I do think constantly being glued to social media like Facebook and Instagram is a huge mistake a lot of people make.

[ryan stewart]

I wouldn't equate texts to social media, but do agree ALL social media is garbage meant to just be poked at occasionally, its all fake.

But texts do have value as they are a low-pressure way of communicating. We would text back and forth all day while at work when a call isnt possible, but when it comes time to actually TALK, yeah, call or meet. Id immediately go dark on a chick if she turned down meeting for coffee to continue to text if things were going well, not looking for a pen pal.

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

I wouldn't equate texts to social media, but do agree ALL social media is garbage meant to just be poked at occasionally, its all fake.

But texts do have value as they are a low-pressure way of communicating. We would text back and forth all day while at work when a call isnt possible, but when it comes time to actually TALK, yeah, call or meet. Id immediately go dark on a chick if she turned down meeting for coffee to continue to text if things were going well, not looking for a pen pal.

Yup, texting is a valuable tool for talking as it's the perfect way to create more tension while at work.

I was talking more about the people who have resorted to seeking instagram likes for validation instead of going out and meeting real people.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

I was talking more about the people who have resorted to seeking instagram likes for validation instead of going out and meeting real people.

Fo sho, and the lying. I think social media is behind the rise in depression because its totally warped the "keeping up with the jonses" BS. EVERYONE is curating their presence, using filters, photoshop, etc so almost nothing on there is the real truth, but then they look at others and they think THOSE are real experiences. So they compare their lies to other peoples lies and feel worse.

And its hilarious just how bad/lazy it is. A buddy is e-dating and he shows me profiles of "hot chicks" and the door frame behind her looks like a fun house mirror and her face is 2d from all of the layers of filtering.

He has shown up on dates and literally could not recognize his date, they had to flag him down. Im like, "Dude, how can you not see this shit?"

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Fo sho, and the lying. I think social media is behind the rise in depression because its totally warped the "keeping up with the jonses" BS. EVERYONE is curating their presence, using filters, photoshop, etc so almost nothing on there is the real truth, but then they look at others and they think THOSE are real experiences. So they compare their lies to other peoples lies and feel worse.

And its hilarious just how bad/lazy it is. A buddy is e-dating and he shows me profiles of "hot chicks" and the door frame behind her looks like a fun house mirror and her face is 2d from all of the layers of filtering.

He has shown up on dates and literally could not recognize his date, they had to flag him down. Im like, "Dude, how can you not see this shit?"

Not sure what is worse, the fact that people do it, or that they think they can do it and not have people question it when they meet in person.

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by CTinline-six

Not sure what is worse, the fact that people do it, or that they think they can do it and not have people question it when they meet in person.

Dude he vents to me all of the time, he just had one recently where, as best he could tell, she was just taking all of her pics and narrowing them. She looked like the pictures but everything about her was 30% wider. And the whole time he is thinking in the back of his head "lying bitch."

I asked him, "Dude, why did you continue? Why not just leave immediately?" He didn't want to look like a vain asshole. My response, "Then just tell yourself its not about looks, its about the fact she is an obvious liar, that is more than enough reason to deny someone."

I can get doing some glamour shots. His friend is a photog so they took his bike to a garage, got out his best threads, and did some photo shoots with awesome lighting and whatever. Thats cool, when i was single I saw some profiles like that and thought, "cool, they taking this shit seriously."

BUt the obvious editing, yeah, I wonder what is going through their minds. Given how many of my buddies who have fallen for it I wonder if they are just getting a dopamine hit from the attention and thinking "I'll woo him so well he wont care when he meets me."

Guys will send me pics of chicks they are e-stalking and I want to start submitting them to reddit: https://www.reddit.com/r/Instagramreality/ All look like that BS.

[nyalpine90]

[Turkish Pickle]

Ehh, you guys arent wrong on social media (she said she doesnt use hers at all, HUGE green flag) but calls? That's third base

[chinniciF32]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Just think about what youd want HER to do with you and reverse it. If youre thinking, "Well, if she liked me she would lean in for a kiss" then do it. As long as she doesnt lean back youre in. Etc.

And, honestly, its a good way to find out if youre a match anyway. If you think, "Man, it would be cool if she just hiked her skirt in the car on the way to dinner and said 'so what are we going to do about this?'" and she gets mad because you whip it out in the car, well, then it wasnt meant to be.

Edit: Word of warning though, if a chick responds positively to you whipping it out and going "So, what are we going to do about this?" just know 2 things: She is going to be a LOT of fun for a LITTLE while AND she will spike a cell phone off of your head at some point.

Solid advice dude im going to apply it this weekend when I take her out for salsa dancing, margaritas and my place.

Agreed on the whole social media thing is pretty lame and superficial but it atleast allows me to see that they are a real person.

I definitely prefer phone calls to texting for the most part but i get the convenience of texting. Plus I don't have an iPhone and everyone else does so I have no idea if someone is just leaving me on read or not

[ryan stewart]

Also one thing I thought about the comment about "delivered" Im wondering what happens when you see the text in the notification and dismiss it from the lock screen without actually opening the app, if it shows as read or just delivered.

Because Im really bad about that, someone will say something benign I dont think merits an immediate response like "that place was cool" and Ill swipe it away and forget to get back to it.

[gatorfast]

Originally Posted by chinniciF32

Plus I don't have an iPhone and everyone else does so I have no idea if someone is just leaving me on read or not

Thats your problem right there. Green texts are a major turn off.

[chinniciF32]

Originally Posted by gatorfast

Thats your problem right there. Green texts are a major turn off.

looks like im getting an iPhone, although a majority of women I talk to are on "Whatsapp" or "Facebook Messenger" but this particular one im talking to now doesn't use either. Her name pops up in my whatsapp contact with a picture and bio so maybe I should message her on there subtly one of these days

[G MONEY]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

Maybe this belongs in the old farts thread, but I'd go a step further and recommend that these youngins stop USING texts completely! My personal cell phone plan does not have any free/included text messages, because I don't use it at all. If someone wants to communicate with me, I'm only 10 digits away by voice. As a side benefit, we can both hear each other's emotions.....

Missing out on the sexting!!!!! 😂😉🤣

[ryan stewart]

Originally Posted by gatorfast

Thats your problem right there. Green texts are a major turn off.

LOL, Ive had a joke thrown my way once or twice but its never stopped me. Really the only complaints are from friends on group texts because I guess that is where it really becomes a "thing"

Id consider switching if I could get it on Google Fi, they have easily the best setup for international travel available in the US.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

If she warned you she's a horrible texter then I wouldn't read to much into as of yet. She prefaced that. Also, if she's that composed and mature going back and forth with texts that don't have substance may not be her thing. She may have read your response and felt she didn't need to send another response (I hope what I'm saying makes sense). I think when a date goes well and you enjoy another persons company it's natural to get excited and slightly over analyze.

I don't think tomorrow would be to soon. It's been a few days and you want to catch her before she makes plans for the weekend. I don't think asking her on a date a few days later is to strong. If you're worried about that maybe just suggest brunch and if it's going well pop the idea of the museum in while you're eating.

Let me know how it goes tomorrow!

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

I agree with Rebekah. I think asking for a date this weekend is acceptable. You youngins need to stop with analyzing texts. How many back and forths are necessary? She said thank you, you said you're welcome. No need for more.

I'm taking the L and moving on, it's been 4 hours since I texted her and no reply lol

We tried

Edit: and this is why I overanalyzed the situation. I'll have to find the meme I'm thinking of rn

[Turkish Pickle]

[Tambohamilton]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Also one thing I thought about the comment about "delivered" Im wondering what happens when you see the text in the notification and dismiss it from the lock screen without actually opening the app, if it shows as read or just delivered.

That's how WhatsApp etc work, yeah.

[IllSic_Design]

Originally Posted by Tambohamilton

That's how WhatsApp etc work, yeah.

lol you didn't really answer.. so if you dismiss from the notif. screen does it show read or just delivered?

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by ryan stewart

Also one thing I thought about the comment about "delivered" Im wondering what happens when you see the text in the notification and dismiss it from the lock screen without actually opening the app, if it shows as read or just delivered.

Because Im really bad about that, someone will say something benign I dont think merits an immediate response like "that place was cool" and Ill swipe it away and forget to get back to it.

It stays on delivered until you click the message. Swiping it away on the notif screen won't say read

Also I'm sure you knew this but you can turn on/off read receipts per person. Mine is off by default except my parents and my close friend

[shoei]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

It stays on delivered until you click the message. Swiping it away on the notif screen won't say read

Also I'm sure you knew this but you can turn on/off read receipts per person. Mine is off by default except my parents and my close friend

She wasn't interested and it was abundantly clear from your story. If you extend the offer and a woman is genuinely interested, she's going to reciprocate in kind. Especially if you asked more than once.

And I think you should take some time to yourself. You legit just came off of heartbreak and you're back diving into the deep end. You're not at a place - at least not that I can see via your posts - where your mojo is flowing. Just take a step back, reassess and do you for a minute. Your name is pickle - the expiration date is extremely long with pickles. There's no rush.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by shoei

She wasn't interested and it was abundantly clear from your story. If you extend the offer and a woman is genuinely interested, she's going to reciprocate in kind. Especially if you asked more than once.

And I think you should take some time to yourself. You legit just came off of heartbreak and you're back diving into the deep end. You're not at a place - at least not that I can see via your posts - where your mojo is flowing. Just take a step back, reassess and do you for a minute. Your name is pickle - the expiration date is extremely long with pickles. There's no rush.

Honestly you're not wrong, I'm not sure about the interested/not part. I didn't ask more than once (obviously know better than that), and for what its worth she ended up replying later on too. She either is genuinely a horrible texter or her MO is "ehhh whatever sure why not". Either way, not feeling it 100%. I understand not wanting to text someone 24/7 (neither do I) but this is just terrible communication lol

Not a fan of the double guessing though. Feeling like there's some games being played that I'm not looking forward to be a part of.

Expiration date is long with Pickles absolutely, and I don't think I'm rushing into anything. I won't contest you on the "your mojo isnt flowing right", though.

[chinniciF32]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

Honestly you're not wrong, I'm not sure about the interested/not part. I didn't ask more than once (obviously know better than that), and for what its worth she ended up replying later on too. She either is genuinely a horrible texter or her MO is "ehhh whatever sure why not". Either way, not feeling it 100%. I understand not wanting to text someone 24/7 (neither do I) but this is just terrible communication lol

Not a fan of the double guessing though. Feeling like there's some games being played that I'm not looking forward to be a part of.

Expiration date is long with Pickles absolutely, and I don't think I'm rushing into anything. I won't contest you on the "your mojo isnt flowing right", though.

Going off how you hit it off and finished off at the party i would say she is definitely "interested" but how much she is interested is always the difficult question, you followed up fine in my opinion not too soon not too late (gotta strike while the iron is still hot). My date took over 5hours to reply from when I asked her out yesterday (which is really slow for her).

Tbh I never bought the horrible texting thing especially with millennials because lets face it for the most part we are looking at our phone at least close to 60% of the day checking emails, texts, playing games, reading articles, etc. I can understand an hour or 2 but thats it as far as response time.

The games suck for sure, its always annoying when in the beginning there are no games and a lot of transparency and then later on the games begin...