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BMW 3-Series (E90 E92) Forum
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david blain spoof
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04-19-2007, 09:13 AM | #7 |
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This was hilarious..
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04-23-2007, 06:33 AM | #8 |
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02-08-2008, 01:01 PM | #9 |
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A Smart Cowboy
A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a
> remote mountainous pasture in California when > suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust > cloud towards him. > > The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci > shoes, RayBan sunglasses and a YSL tie, leans > out the window and asks the cowboy, 'If I tell > you exactly how many cows and calves you have > in your herd, will you give me a calf?' > > Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then > looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly > answers, 'Sure, Why not?' > > The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell > notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular > BLUETOOTH cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page > on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS > satellite to get an exact fix on his location > which he then feeds to another NASA satellite > that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution > photo. > > The young man then opens the digital photo in > Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image > processing facility in Hamburg, Germany. > > Within seconds, he receives an email on his > Palm Pilot that the image has been processed > and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL > database through an ODBC connected Excel > spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, > after a few minutes, receives a response. > > Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page > report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet > printer and finally turns to the cowboy and > says, 'You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves.' > > > 'That's right. Well, I guess you can take one > of my calves,' says Bud. > > He watches the young man select one of the > animals and looks on amused as the young man > stuffs it into the trunk of his car. > > Then the Bud says to the young man, 'Hey, if I > can tell you exactly what your business is, > will you give me back my calf?' > > The young man thinks about it for a second and > then says, 'Okay, why not?' > > 'You're a Congressman for the U.S.Government', > says Bud. > > 'Wow! That's correct,' says the yuppie, 'but > how did you guess that?' > > > > > 'No guessing required.' answered the cowboy. > 'You showed up here even though nobody called > you; you want to get paid for an answer I > already knew, to a question I never asked. You > tried to show me how much smarter than me you > are; and you don't know a thing about > cows...this is a herd of sheep. . . . > > > > Now give me back my dog. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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02-08-2008, 04:13 PM | #10 |
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I always wonder where Teknochild went...
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02-08-2008, 05:22 PM | #11 | |
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Quote:
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02-15-2008, 03:20 AM | #12 |
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vid removed
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02-15-2008, 04:13 AM | #13 |
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