[bubbletea 4 me]

Originally Posted by Spec 1

This x10. You seem to be very different minded, in that you said "why would you ever date more than one person at once?" etc. I've been primarily single for the last 6 years, and I'm usually either dating nobody or 3 girls at the same time. Dating is one thing, you're getting to know each other and see if you can spend quality time together. After a while (generally a month or two for me, say 7+ dates) if you find the person awesome you enter a relationship. At THAT point, you don't date others. You sir, were not in a relationship and were just dating, so I agree with chicka in that she did nothing wrong. If y'all hadn't had a conversation about being exclusive, you wern't. Don't be so smitten you can't see that. Sorry dude.


Have had this problem in the past myself. Usually comes along with abandonment issues and shows they had problems being close with their parents when younger.
Short and concise


See man, this is what I'm talking about. You must have been reared differently then many of us. It's not uncommon for me to be dating 2-3 women at a time. They generally don't know about each other and I don't feel a need for them to unless I decide I want a relationship with one of those girls. It's not that I'm in a "rush", it's that I end up meeting women around the same time and give them chances to show their qualities - they could very well just turn into friends but I have to date them to find that out, eh. I'm not quick into a relationship, which sounds like your girl isn't either. If you assume you're together after 4-5 dates, especially when yall chat all night "over AIM, not the phone", then you sir, ARE clingy like she said.

It doesn't take 10 dates to feel a connection, but it does take 10 dates to know if I want to waste the next 6 months or more with a woman. People aren't who they come across as up front and it takes a while to get that.

Sorry to side with the woman (gaaah! Hate doing that! ) but I have to.\



Edit: It also doesn't seem like OP and chick were getting it on. I try to only sleep with 1 girl at a time, even if I'm dating 3 of them. We can't assume this chick is a 'hoe' or whatever especially if her and OP were only doing a few makeout sessions, etc.

+1 Agree with everything you said here.

well i don't see anything wrong with that if you guys never talked about being mutually exclusive..dunno how it is for the older crowd but in college, dating just means you're doing just that dating..when u start talking about gf/bf and being exclusive then that's when you get to be angry about her dating/seeing other guys but until then, not much u can really do but yea fk girls...

[Kroy]

I think OP is more pissed that she lied to him. Like how she said she was picking up a drunk girlfriend but went to spend the night with her ex-boyfriend. That's not an innocent lie... At least not to me.

[Spec 1]

Originally Posted by Kroy

I think OP is more pissed that she lied to him. Like how she said she was picking up a drunk girlfriend but went to spend the night with her ex-boyfriend. That's not an innocent lie... At least not to me.

Would totally rather the girl I'm dating tell me she's going to go pick up a friend then she's going to go sleep with her ex. Why would I need to/want to know that info? It's her right to do what she wants with herself, and OP wasn't exclusive with her (comeon... 4-5 dates?) so why should she tell him all about her personal life?

[ragingclue]

Originally Posted by Spec 1

Would totally rather the girl I'm dating tell me she's going to go pick up a friend then she's going to go sleep with her ex. Why would I need to/want to know that info? It's her right to do what she wants with herself, and OP wasn't exclusive with her (comeon... 4-5 dates?) so why should she tell him all about her personal life?

Well there's a fundamental difference in the value systems of people posting in here. Some are very traditional, some are "sex, drugs, rock n roll, free love" hippies. That's cool; there's always going to be a difference of opinion there, and there are areas in between.

Lying is not cool. Who knows what else she's lied about.... If she had "withheld the truth", maybe that would have been better, but bold-faced lies don't sit well with me, no matter what morals you rely on to dictate your love life.

[Vanity]

Originally Posted by Aonarch

I assume that would happen to me if I was to continue dating her. My assumption is that she was seeing other people and then one day Mr. football jock asked her to be exclusive and she erased you and every other guy.

As to that whole outtake on dating... I'm not sure it's growing up in the South, but I've never considered it normal to date multiple people at once. I understand that you can go on a date then another date with another person, but I just don't understand why anybody would be that big in a rush. Also it shouldn't take 10 dates to feel a connection, in my mind it should be apparent rather quickly.

She did erase more than just one person... so this actually might be true. I'm relatively fresh-minded to this dating world so I guess I'm still adjusting. From what you guys have said it seems women are some big problems >_> Anyone wanna convince me why I should ever get into a relationship? LOL

MAN! The girl I knew was genuine, sweet, cute, smart, and active! She even talked about where we were at together and reassured me she wasn't seeing any other guys. Then this happens... Found out later that the day after she erased me from her life she slept with some guys. THE VERY NEXT DAY like wtf cmon how the fuck does this shit happen!!!!

[silvergray545]

I've never in my life heard that it is ok to date more than one person at a time. I, myself, will never do such a thing. That's just wrong, IMO.

To the OP, if she was lying to you off the get, don't sweat it too much. The lies will just continue to build. This isn't only for boyfriends and girlfriends, it applies to everybody. The one thing that I absolutely hate the most is being lied to. I can't stand it.

Originally Posted by Spec 1

Would totally rather the girl I'm dating tell me she's going to go pick up a friend then she's going to go sleep with her ex. Why would I need to/want to know that info? It's her right to do what she wants with herself, and OP wasn't exclusive with her (comeon... 4-5 dates?) so why should she tell him all about her personal life?

This is just wrong on every level. First, I wouldn't trust a girl that is still banging her ex. I've seen plenty of my friends that got dumped by their girlfriend for an ex. Second, if you're dating a girl and you're not exclusive yet, it's ok for her to go out and bang another dude? To me, this just doesn't make sense.

[Vanity]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

I've never in my life heard that it is ok to date more than one person at a time. I, myself, will never do such a thing. That's just wrong, IMO.

To the OP, if she was lying to you off the get, don't sweat it too much. The lies will just continue to build. This isn't only for boyfriends and girlfriends, it applies to everybody. The one thing that I absolutely hate the most is being lied to. I can't stand it.


This is just wrong on every level. First, I wouldn't trust a girl that is still banging her ex. If seen plenty of my friends that got dumped by their girlfriend for an ex. Second, if you're dating a girl and you're not exclusive yet, it's ok for her to go out and bang another dude? To me, this just doesn't make sense.

+100000000

This man has his shit in order.

[Kroy]

Originally Posted by Spec 1

Would totally rather the girl I'm dating tell me she's going to go pick up a friend then she's going to go sleep with her ex. Why would I need to/want to know that info? It's her right to do what she wants with herself, and OP wasn't exclusive with her (comeon... 4-5 dates?) so why should she tell him all about her personal life?

Obviously I would rather not know a girl I was dating is sleeping with others, but I'd like to know cause I'd DTB or re-evaluate her for booty call.


After 4-5 dates, I would consider them to be somewhere in a relationship; maybe not enough to be mutually exclusive, but I'd expect the topic to be discussed at some point. If she was just concealing personal info that's relevent to her only, then I'd say she was in the right. But it really sounds like she was trying to play the OP. She probably assumed he would react badly (and with good reason) to the news of her sleeping with the ex. Her decision to lie is one that will affect both herself and OP.

If the girl you were dating but have not had sex had a STD, would she have been in the right to keep that info secret too? By your rational, if you're not committed (and in this case, the guy isn't even harmed), there's no harm.

Originally Posted by silvergray545

I've never in my life heard that it is ok to date more than one person at a time. I, myself, will never do such a thing. That's just wrong, IMO.

To the OP, if she was lying to you off the get, don't sweat it too much. The lies will just continue to build. This isn't only for boyfriends and girlfriends, it applies to everybody. The one thing that I absolutely hate the most is being lied to. I can't stand it.


This is just wrong on every level. First, I wouldn't trust a girl that is still banging her ex. I've seen plenty of my friends that got dumped by their girlfriend for an ex. Second, if you're dating a girl and you're not exclusive yet, it's ok for her to go out and bang another dude? To me, this just doesn't make sense.

I do have a question though... Did girl tell OP she wasn't seeing anyone else? I can understand dating multiple people, just not lying.

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by ragingclue

Yeah I never understood how some women think it's ok to mix man juice inside of them... That's just ridiculous. And to think she wouldn't even mention that it was going on to the OP.... Fuck, if I found out I had possibly been up in that when someone else's swimmers could still be in the water, I'd go ballistic. Dating multiple people and having it cleared with everyone involved is one thing, to hide it is another.

My thoughts exactly. I wouldn't have cared if she told me the truth about it, but the fact that she constantely lied to me is just ridiculous. Also I didn't get dumped, she still likes me and wants to keep going out. I told her while laughing, how the hell do you expect me to forget all of this? I'm sorry but this will not work out...

She is confused as to why I'm like this....

Wow!!!

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by Kroy

I think OP is more pissed that she lied to him. Like how she said she was picking up a drunk girlfriend but went to spend the night with her ex-boyfriend. That's not an innocent lie... At least not to me.

Yes!!! Thats what I'm trying to get across. I'm emotionally numb and realize that we weren't in a relationship. What I'm trying to say is the whole banging the other dude thing. I don't want that...

As you said it was the lying all the constant constant lies. I'm the master of lying lol... I make a living by stretching the truth and picking up on lies. I reminded her of this, that its nearly impossible to lie to me and I appreciate the truth. She would lie straight to my face and I would just look at her and say its ok you can tell me the truth, she would say thats the real story I hate drama and try changing the subject. So I would let it go, only to discover the truth. I wasn't going through garbage or anything its a small town lol, I have friends in this town... I found out about the boyfriend from a girlfriend of mine who said that she saw her with this guy with a military haircut and army stickers... Lol... A quick check of her facebook profile revealed some hidden secrets. I told her that I found out and she was still apprehensive. I was as kind as possible!

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by Kroy

Obviously I would rather not know a girl I was dating is sleeping with others, but I'd like to know cause I'd DTB or re-evaluate her for booty call.


After 4-5 dates, I would consider them to be somewhere in a relationship; maybe not enough to be mutually exclusive, but I'd expect the topic to be discussed at some point. If she was just concealing personal info that's relevent to her only, then I'd say she was in the right. But it really sounds like she was trying to play the OP. She probably assumed he would react badly (and with good reason) to the news of her sleeping with the ex. Her decision to lie is one that will affect both herself and OP.

If the girl you were dating but have not had sex had a STD, would she have been in the right to keep that info secret too? By your rational, if you're not committed (and in this case, the guy isn't even harmed), there's no harm.





I do have a question though... Did girl tell OP she wasn't seeing anyone else? I can understand dating multiple people, just not lying.

Yes she told me that she wasnt dating anyone.

[Kroy]

Originally Posted by Aonarch

My thoughts exactly. I wouldn't have cared if she told me the truth about it, but the fact that she constantely lied to me is just ridiculous. Also I didn't get dumped, she still likes me and wants to keep going out. I told her while laughing, how the hell do you expect me to forget all of this? I'm sorry but this will not work out...

She is confused as to why I'm like this....
Wow!!!

some of us just have principles, man. maybe she'll acquire a set of them one day.

BTW she may just want you for NSA. she did mention she didn't care if you dated other people as long as she didn't know.

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by Kroy

some of us just have principles, man. maybe she'll acquire a set of them one day.

BTW she may just want you for NSA. she did mention she didn't care if you dated other people as long as she didn't know.

We had a very long talk about how we both wanted a long term relationship together, but we were going to take that part slow. Now we never said anything about being mutually exclusive or non mutually exclusive but she told me that she wasn't seeing anybody.

[FStop7]

what kind of rifles did you use when deployed?

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by FStop7

what kind of rifles did you use when deployed?

Nice thread steal! JK. Mainly the M40A3, we had some Barretts, but they aren't very portable as you probably know. We got to shoot some Cheytacs, those things are bad ass.

[GreenPlease]

Well, he was a scout sniper so I'd be willing to bet an M40A3. Other possibilities include modified M-16s (like what the army issues to SDMs), the mark 12 spr, or the barrett. Those are all just guesses though. I'm not terribly familiar with the Marines.

Edit: didn't see that^ post

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by GreenPlease

Well, he was a scout sniper so I'd be willing to bet an M40A3. Other possibilities include modified M-16s (like what the army issues to SDMs), the mark 12 spr, or the barrett. Those are all just guesses though. I'm not terribly familiar with the Marines.

Edit: didn't see that^ post

Yes I had a Mk12 as my duty rifle. A Mk12 is an Olympic Arms M16A1 lower with an upper made by Knights with a Leuy uhh... Mk4 scope? Also a Surefire suppressor. We also had M9s with suppressors.

[silvergray545]

Originally Posted by Aonarch

We had a very long talk about how we both wanted a long term relationship together, but we were going to take that part slow. Now we never said anything about being mutually exclusive or non mutually exclusive but she told me that she wasn't seeing anybody.

So much for that long term relationship...lol.

[Alexander]

Originally Posted by silvergray545

So much for that long term relationship...lol.

Lol, yup...

[BMW F22]

I suppose I can relate to why you are so mad. I personally prefer to date one girl at a time. However, if I or the girl I'm dating are dating other people I wouldn't feel cheated or anything like that. I would be surprised mainly because I didn't know but other than that I'm sure I'd be fine with it. In your case you're just in disbelief right now because you thought you guys were exclusive. Just keep telling that yourself that you guys were only dating and you'll be fine. Again it's harder said than done but you'll pull through it no doubt.

[TRZ06]

Well, not sure how old you are, but at age 36, I can say pretty safely that most girls under 25 - 26 are FWB material. Girls are doing a lot of exploring, dating, f*ucking in their early 20's.

Relationship minded girls are in the 26 - 30 range, and marriage minded girls are 30+.

Things are different these days, women are staying single longer and playing around and not settling down until they are older.