[Johnny Lin]

I think the deposits are refundable. Sorry to hear your sitution. Hope you will get her back! Good Luck!

[gongtowjai]

Take delivery of the car, enjoy it... She walk for a reason. If you reconcile, which you should try, she might walk again. File for divorce, ask HER for alimony and you're all square again. Remember, she walk first...you don't get mad, you get even...cwn23 is right:rocks:

[uberschnell]

How old are some of you posters? Ditch the idea of a car until you get your shit wired tight. Do you have a clue why she left you? This just went down and you think you have enough of a grip on everything to go forward with a buying a 50K car? The fact that you’re even tripping about a car at this very moment tells me something is askew.
Have you even thought about the possible costs you will incur if this heads towards divorce? Lawyer’s fees? Alimony? Can you afford to fuck up your credit by defaulting on a car loan?

If you asked any financial advisor what to do next do you think the phrase “buy a new BMW now” would be included in any of their advise?

Bro, I think you are in denial about where you are and what you might be up against.

[uberschnell]

File for divorce, ask HER for alimony and you're all square again.

This is California dude, men don't stand a chance in divorce court.

[cwn23]

Listen certain things are meant to be...For a women to walk out means that there are problems, some can be fix but others can't...I am 37 years old and i encountered something very similar and I tried to make it work, only to realize that all of my effort was futile and she wanted nothing to do with me...She wanted to experience life as she said....so I had no choice but to let her go and get divorce ( even though i treated her like gold) >>>Its been 7 years since and she periodically calls me and regrets what she did and her life is a mess now....but for me it was the best thing because i found a women that is perfect for me and now we have two kids and I have a New 335i convertible on the way!!!!!! Tell you again if she walks that means she is either messing around with someone else or something to that effect...Go and live your life...If you have no kids there is no alimony plus she walked out on you...The only thing is if you own a home together!!! anyway good luck to what ever you do, I wish the best for you and i am only speaking on behlaf of my own experience!!!

[BMWfan07]

Originally Posted by cwn23

Listen certain things are meant to be...For a women to walk out means that there are problems, some can be fix but others can't...I am 37 years old and i encountered something very similar and I tried to make it work, only to realize that all of my effort was futile and she wanted nothing to do with me...She wanted to experience life as she said....so I had no choice but to let her go and get divorce ( even though i treated her like gold) >>>Its been 7 years since and she periodically calls me and regrets what she did and her life is a mess now....but for me it was the best thing because i found a women that is perfect for me and now we have two kids and I have a New 335i convertible on the way!!!!!! Tell you again if she walks that means she is either messing around with someone else or something to that effect...Go and live your life...If you have no kids there is no alimony plus she walked out on you...The only thing is if you own a home together!!! anyway good luck to what ever you do, I wish the best for you and i am only speaking on behlaf of my own experience!!!

We have a couple of things in common. I am 37 years old as well. My wife is giving me the same comments, that she wants space and freedom to do what she wants with her life. I give a lot, she takes a lot. I don't think she has thought this all through and she might regret it later, but at this point it is impossible to get anywhere with her. I have not given up yet, but it's looking a little hopeless. We are married 3 years now, no kids, and the house has no equity, and the house value has not increased since it was bought 9 months ago. The new 335i I ordered should have reached the port in SoCal today. Some who have posted here, suggested I go ahead and get the car, so have a couple of my good friends. The thought of the new car is one of the few pleasant things I have left. It will be tight financially for me, but I can find a way to make it. Thanks for sharing a bit of your story with us.

[Ccatznip]

Originally Posted by sinnet112

Talk about an awful and distasteful first post.

He does drive a civic.

[psychoactive]

hey man when I put my deposit down they said it was 100% refundable... I think they will give it back, as others have stated, they will have absolutely no problem selling that car when it arrives...

[John 070]

Originally Posted by TiAg335i

I'm not married nor do I have a girlfriend but if you cannot finance the vehicle when it arrives without your wife do not take delivery. Your priority should be to contact your wife asap and find out what's up if she left without any reason.

I find it odd how you care more about the car at this point than your wife...I smell BS, especially with your 3 post count

My g/f jokes that I love the new more car more than I do her...it can happen. We treat our cars like our baby, which many people don't understand or feel. This dude in my office overheard another enthusiast and me talking about cars, and he goes, "I don't get people who are into cars, at all." Well, seems to me he was talking big how he was going to get an RX8 or 350Z 2 years ago, looks like his dreams are all washed up....

You have a very good point. One should not rely on a significant other to buy an expensive car (I consider anything more than 25k expensive). That's why I did it prior to getting engaged (still haven't done it but very soon). I never understood that finance an engagement ring then get married and the girl has to help pay thingy, which is similar to relying on her income for the car imho.

[John 070]

Originally Posted by Magna3

This is California dude, men don't stand a chance in divorce court.

*LOL* I thought that property acquired pre-marriage, or separate property stays as such? Whatever the situation, I'm sure case law dictates what realistic outcomes are....best to just avoid CA and TX, that's common sense....not sure which other states have community prop., Wisconsin, Arizona, Washington?

[uberschnell]

A few years ago my friend went through this same thing. His wife was cheating on him and left. New home, no kids, nice car. His wife was entitled to half of everything. One of the funniest (saddest) things she did was come over and take half of the food they had, including spices, dressings, ice cream etc. Apparently she and the new boyfriend (who happened to leave his wife also) were hurting for money. Eventually he had to borrow against the house in order to buy her out for the settlement.

Your wife owns half of everything, and if she gets a decent lawyer she can screw you over big time.

Point is, without having a clue whats going to happen to you financially in the near future does it make any sense to get yourself into further debt?

Put it off for 6 months. If you are cool money-wise at that point, get it. If you find you are not, then be glad you didn't make the mistake of buying it.

-Also, I would recommend talking to a divorce lawyer about what can and can't happen here in California, instead of relying on anecdotes from anonymous posters.

[cwn23]

If she is having an affair prolong the divorce....and claim abandonment...She left you and its adultery under any anecdote!!!!!!!!!!!

[uberschnell]

One of the most f#$$# up things about California law is that whether or not someone cheated does not factor into the settlement.

http://www.divorcesupport.com/divorc...imony-441.html

CA is not a good place to get divorced in.

[chbrules]

Just refuse to sign the divorce papers. You don't have to, that way they can't take your money. Plus, you're stupid for not signing a pre-nub. I'm having my wife sign one, not of disrespect for her, but out of respect that money and marriages should not intertwine like such. Money turns people sour.

[BMWfan07]

Well, an update if anyone is interested. Things will not work out with my wife, situation took an ugly turn for the worse. I want to reconcile, she does not, she wants a new life. (without me obviously) I'm not happy about it, keeping as busy as possible, but still not sleeping well, and I've lost 15 pounds.

On another front, my CA tells me my new 335i will arrive at the dealership in 4 or 5 days according to his estimation, car is at VPC now. I'm looking forward to the car arriving, admittedly my excitement is toned down quite a bit at the moment, but it wasn't the day my wife was sitting next to me at the computer while we were looking at colors and options for the new car.

Well, that's it folks.

By the way, anyone here have real expertise on California community property law??

[cwn23]

I am happy to hear that you are going ahead with the car...As far as the wife situation, i feel for you....Just remember things really truly happen for a reason, it might sound like a clique, but i am a perfect example of it...Things will turn around quickly for you, but get this divorce behind you as quick as possible to get closure in your life...Millions of Americans live a life that is about credit and checks and balances!!! The car for you is now a channel to get out of this depression or rutt that your in...Keep up the spirits and a new ride will due it for you...

[scottwww]

Forget about the car for now. Get one of these or something else later, once the dust has settled and you know what you can do. Even if you did get the car, are you guaranteed that you would keep it? Or would your wife get it or equal value from the divorce settlement (if it came down to that)?

[DustinDallas]

Originally Posted by trick50

Get the car....and get an extra job...a bullshit job like something you would do when you were in high school...like working at the Gap or TGI Fridays (no offense to anyone who might work there) and with your new car...you can bang out all of the hot 18 years old sluts that work there.

Congrats on the wife.

dude, i love you. haha

[flush01]

lately sh!t ain't going that good for me either, but getting 335 is my only excitement at this time, so im getting it... but my situation is abit different, I dont have to give up half of my stuff to a chick, and i saved up enough for year+ expenses... so my suggestion is, if you really have to give up half and don't got enough money saved up DONT get the car... but if you dont have to give up anything, got $ saved up, then get the car...